Absentee

All I have to say today is that my Thanksgiving was fantastic...
I'm working on several projects, and I will return to this blog at some point in the near future. Sorry for my absenteeism!
Live is Grand ^.^

Projects

"Two Hearts Divided"

Basically describes the way I feel about any of my (past,present or future) relationships with those who possess a "Y" chromosome.

I'm not and will not EVER be "in love" or "relationship" material. 

I'm too moody, independent, bull headed, stubborn....need I continue?

 I think not.  

"The Eye of the Storm"

Learning how to use a palette knife with acrylics is quite an adventure! I just love the innumerable ways you can manipulate the paint and blend colors. 

I have so much to learn, but I'm certainly having fun with it!

"Victory"

I painted this with acrylic on canvas for Kory, my most favorite man (child....I almost can't use the word child anymore cuz he's growing into such a fine man...but he will always be my BABY anyway!)

He asked me to read Revelation and paint something that depicted Christ's victory over Satan. SO...it took me quite awhile to come up with what I would add to the painting. He wanted me to be sure I included "the white horse that death rode upon"..so I did that. I tried to get in a few images of "weeping and gnashing of teeth" in the fire. It was the most challenging piece I've been requested to do thus far. Typically I get a photo and am just requested to render a portrait from it, but this was quite different and subjective. 

"Awakenings"

I wasn't completely sure if this piece would be more realistic, or abstract...but I think it's a cross between the two. It definitely appears to be a sunrise/sunset to all who have commented on it but initially I was just wanting to make it a bright outburst of color. I guess it can be interpreted in any way one wants to interpret it. 

Speaking of awakenings...as I was saying at the beginning of this post...I am absolutely content with how things in my life are going right now. I sort of like the idea of most of my friends being on line because it's "safe" that way. I've been approached by different people wanting to "set me up" with friends of theirs, and wanting to meet up with me, but do i really want to subject someone to...myself? 

Nah, unless someone already knows me well and still wants to hang out with me in a friendship only situation, I think I'll remain the hermit that I am and just hang with Mom while I still have the chance. She and I don't get in each other's way too much and we will be moving for the FINAL time at the end of February! 

Woo Hoo!!!! 

Critique or comments on my new adventure in acrylics is always welcome. 

Cheers & God Bless ;)

House Hunting

I've never been much on shopping around for anything.

I know what I'm looking for, I go find it, buy it & go home.

This simply doesn't work when you're searching for a house, does it? 

It took me quite awhile, but I finally did find a house. 

Then the fun began with the inspections, appraisals, paperwork and realizing just how connected you still are to someone if you were married to them 

for 16 years (divorced or not.) 

I'm glad that we are still on relatively friendly terms because it could have been 

quite difficult if we were not.

I'm pretty sure most of the tedious running is completed and that I'll actually be able to move in by the end of January. Oh, the joys of moving. I've heard of deals "falling through" and people having their hearts broken over it so I'm not going to post any pix or say that I actually have the house until it's a done deal...but if God wills, it will be so nice to be in a more rural area and out of the busy little neighborhood I'm living in now. 

It will also be great to know that what I'm spending on my house payment is actually going to be mine and I'm not just lining someone else's pockets with rent money. 

It's quite a charming little...well, maybe not so little, home on a couple of wooded acres in the Dungeness Valley area. A little further to drive to work, but not too far. 

It's got a lovely, large covered back porch looking out over a cute little pond...a wonderful place to paint, read, or just enjoy being outdoors.

There's a shop that will be perfect to turn into my little art studio. 

I am grateful for the prayers that have gone up on my behalf.

I've been out of touch with my poor blog again, because I've been in and out of my 'dark place' lately...October through December typically does that to me...but I'm really looking forward to the move, to settling down. I have a few great friends here at home and tons of on line friends who are all so encouraging. The artists I've met on line seem to understand the ups and downs I go through because many of them go through it as well.  

I can't complain.

 It seems that things are looking up in my world. 

AND

I get to see my baby boy later today! 

Can't wait to show him our 'new' house, where he will actually have his own 

room/man cave/private place.

Merry Christmas to us....and to all of you! 

Past and Present

It's crazy how I can look back on so many different situations in my life and realize that I have managed to push SO many people away. Good people. People who loved me. 

I believe in my heart that I have stopped doing that now...but at the same time, 

I do not easily get close to anyone. 

I have only really allowed one person to actually get close in recent years, and that bit me pretty hard. I consider myself to be intelligent enough to learn from my mistakes, and the fact that I made that one doesn't bother me in the slightest anymore. I simply chalk it up to the fact that I had a lot of changes happening in my life all at once and 

I was in a vulnerable place. 

The snakes...they know exactly when to prey on the the weak and how to target the strong when we're down,  don't they? It's cool though, because they'll get 

what they've got coming. 

I have re-connected with some of the friends I had back in my younger days. I have kept in sketchy touch with them over the years, but recently have talked a lot more to some of them. They are all long distance, of course, so that helps me feel "safe" I suppose. I really really miss the close friendships I had. I am so glad that they have forgiven me for my shortcomings and shallowness and seem to love me just the same as ever. I saw one of them in person in August and am planning to go see another after the Holidays. I can not wait. I almost have butterflies in my belly just thinking about it!!  

:))))))))

 I just had the conversation with my sweet baby boy about how nearly ALL of the people I talk to nowadays are on line. Most of them I have never met, and I'm okay with that. It amazes me the avenues that the internet opens up for me. Like I said in my previous post, I am really happy to be able to network with people who are fellow artists. I love getting ideas from them, having the chance to share stories and even exchange art work. It's a real blessing for me.

It seems that creative people (at least the ones I have 'met') have a similar pattern of emotions as I do...the roller coaster type mood swings, for example. 

At one end of the spectrum there are times when I am on top of the world and those are the times when I seem to be really cranking out art work. I'm happy, I talk a lot, I don't mind receiving phone calls, emails or messages.  The opposite end is when I can just barely make myself get out of bed, I have frequent migraines, and I have a creative block and can't seem to get anything onto paper, canvas or even write any words. Those seem to be the times when I neglect my blog and my blogger, FB, Twitter & Etsy friends and just hide in the cave of my mind waiting for it to go away so I can feel good again. 

I don't know positively that everyone goes to such extremes, but most of them have discussed the "down" time and the "block" that goes with it. It may be assuming too much to believe that every creative person has as jacked up a brain as I do, but hey...

I suppose I'm a little narcissistic sometimes.

I do have ONE good friend here who was sort of an "instant friend" when we met. We are the same age, we are both artistic and although our backgrounds are totally different, we can just hang out together and be comfortable. Like family. She's wonderful & I love her.

I really appreciate being back 'home' and being able to really be myself. I was so very happy to get out of the South where people play nice to your face, then immediately go and gossip to whoever will listen about what a sinner you are...or whatever they can come up with to gossip about. 

DON'T GET ME WRONG!!!

I'm not stereotyping every person in the South because I do know some super great people from there, some are my current on line buds!  I'm just saying that the vast majority of those I met and believed were my friends, were really stabbing me in the back the whole time I lived there and I didn't even know it until I went through my divorce.

 I'm happy to be aware now. 

I'm glad I am in a place where most people are real. Not afraid to say it like it is...and once they do, it's out in the open and we can still be friends afterward.

I'm trying to practice the little poem at the beginning of this post! 

I'm getting closer to picking out a house that I like, by the way...I'll share pix once I decide and get approved. 

Thanks for the prayers!